Date Night #8: every Fun in the Fair

Ah date night. That great evening once you attach the bravery into the sticking point and place yourself online for 1 even more spin on the merry-go-round of really love. That One took place during the Blythe Hill Festival, in which we visited check out some Scummy Mummies…

And so I was convinced I found myself planning to die. The road in advance was actually hazy and shimmering from the intensity of the midday sun as it bore down on top folks. While I became already as a result of the bare minimum of garments, i really could however feel the sweat pouring down my personal back. I’d half-heartedly made an effort to generate a sunhat from my socks, it was actually a completely wasted work. Previously that day, the follower in the living room had exploded with a loud bang and a flash of fire, preferring to make committing suicide in the place of endure heat any more. I got a swig from my personal beer, and made the decision that was just about it. From the hottest day of the entire year, I found myself probably die halfway up a hill in South London, on my way to a village fair. Exactly how embarrassing.

Today I know what you’re thinking: “Why would a person exposure his life in the hottest day of the entire year to go to a town fair?”

The answer is, definitely, friendship. Some time ago, certainly one of my personal funniest friends, Ellie Gibson made the decision it absolutely was time for you to go after the woman lifelong think of getting a stand-up comedian. It really is in her bloodstream in the end – her father was actually the infamous 80’s choice comedian Jim Barclay. Brilliantly, making use of the clockwork sense of comic time this lady units would become known for, she managed to coincide this bold new career path utilizing the beginning of the woman very first kid. Nurseries and comedy clubs most likely aren’t that different, brain – after all, they may be both filled with mewling brats desperate for interest. Anyway, while on the woman comedy odyssey, she came across Aussie comical Helen Thorne, who had been additionally a young mum, and additionally they quickly clicked, and began the Scummy Mummies podcast, with swiftly become very well-known child-rearing podcasts on iTunes.

Today they were having their own show on the way, you start with an appearance within Blythe Hill Festival, that was precisely why I found myself dragging me up a hill like a French Legionnaire abandoned into the wilderness. Naturally, it just got one appearance from my personal girlfriend V. and I chose my self up-and wandered the last few gardens up the hill to start our very own go out. And just what an excellent look welcomed me personally. A solitary fun fair experience! One meals vehicle! A beer dining table! The entire world’s saddest cakestand, filled up with nothing but the melted keeps of someone’s baking hubris! In all honesty, ‘festival’ was a bit of a stretch – minutes before I’d already been stressed i would end from heating, now I became faced with a fête worse than death.

After queuing up for all thousand hrs for a pint (ok two pints. Well. Six.) of over-priced alcohol, we happened up to the “undetectable level” (they certainly weren’t joking), the spot where the Scummy Mummies were going to do. Helen and Ellie felt in good spirits, despite the fact that in correct vertebral Tap style, they were second in the bill to a Punch and Judy show. Not that you had know it though, as audience lapped up their particular confessions of Scummy parenting (Ellie: “A yummy mummy nourishes her children an organic quinoa green salad for lunch.” Helen: “While a Scummy Mummy nourishes the woman kids fishfingers. Sometimes not even made.” Ellie: “Or while we call-it, Captain Birdseye Sashimi.”). The mums and dads even offered several of their particular scummy confessions, utilizing the emphasize being a submission from a young child who would scrawled on the card “the period my Daddy was actually sick-in a bin.”

Inspite of the heating, the duo belted through their own product just as if these were headlining the Pyramid period at Glastonbury, that includes a rousing rendition of “I’d do just about anything For like” with deftly reworked words to complete. It had been an excellent performance, stuffed with great laughs, winning shows, and some great wig work. V. and I obviously are not moms and dads, but we loved every minute from it.

The Punch-and-Judy tv show after was pretty good as well.

I guarantee that by this time the coming year, both of these (Er, Ellie and Helen, maybe not Punch-and-Judy) need unique talk tv series, a fistful of honors and a support handle Birdseye, and that is not just the six beers in addition to sunstroke speaking – trust me, it’s fête.

*Admittedly, you’re probably actually thinking “exactly why is this man very chronically unfit which he are unable to walk up a slope in the sun without turning into Swamp Thing?”

** In equity, it actually was a pizza truck labeled as “VanDough”, therefore perk factors for that.


If you wish to decide to try a romantic date with the Scummy Mummies on your own, see their unique official website where you are able to install their own hilarious Podcasts and check out future concert tour dates.


Jon Hamblin writes ‘The Things i have completed to Impress Women”, a leading blog site that details his constant disappointments to wow any women actually ever. Read about their various other Date Nights here.

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